Works of summer semester 2024

I was very confused at the beginning of the semester. I had no idea what to think about my last feedback; I wasn't sure if I understood it right, and I didn't know if I wanted to agree with it. I wasn't able to find the reason why my art was meant to be created and take up space in this overcrowded world. I wasn't sure if I wanted to paint.

I think that my internship at Visiting Artist's Studio put me back on track. The excitement from art that I could see in new faces was slowly returning me to my own excitement from painting. Although I felt a bit overwhelmed at times, maybe I was a little bit over–inspired. I felt like I was left in a space surrounded by exciting thoughts, artists, and paintings, but I didn't know what I should grab on to.

So I have started slowly. I tried to paint some portraits, and I found joy in painting some intuitive cooperative paintings with my friends.

Then Tomáš got a dog; his name is Konstantin. We have never had a dog. My dad is allergic, and my mom didn't like dogs because one dog had eaten our bread one day. I always find it strange when I see Kosťa peeing on the building. People are not allowed to do that. It could cost a fine of up to 1000 Czech crowns. And if you had sex in public, it may cost up to 10 000. Animals do it quite often. And people quite usually watch their dog doing it with another dog or how he is making a poo. Then we put the poo in a plastic bag, where it will chill for 25 years.

But it is not really about defecating or having sex in public. I just like to use these pictures because they can be funny. I don't want to take things too seriously. Maybe I'm a little afraid of it, and it would be good to dare to be more serious. But I also like when my painting is a little bit stupid or awkward and I can see people laugh while looking at it. There is never enough laughter. There are enough serious things. So yeah, some of my paintings are stupid, but to be true, they captured my really serious inner processes and feelings about nature and the world.

I miss trees and mountains. I miss nature. I am sick of the city. But nature is everything I guess. We are nature. I can't stop myself from looking at the world like I am here for the first time. Well, I am, it is the first time. Maybe. I can't stop asking the questions. I am still full of fascination, and I am surprised by common things very often. Like a dog or a flower or a horse. I observe people, and I observe animals. After all, there's not a difference between people and animals. We are just animals. What are we playing at? Wouldn't it be nice if we stopped playing those games and became more like them? More natural. Do not try to fit somewhere so hard. But there are also pretty things that make people human.

I am thinking about all that while I am painting my pictures. I am lost in the misunderstanding of the world—whether in the artistic one or in the real one and I still don't know much. I am just trying to understand who I am and who we are. I feel like there's no other option but to be honest. I can't be anything else.

I have not picked up any topic for my semester work. I just wanted to paint. Paint out of my confusion from painting. My work was very much of me, which is maybe selfish–and maybe–pure and remarkable. Either way, it gave me a lot of freedom, and it made me feel lighter. So at the end of the semester, I felt like I had found again why I paint. It's something inside me that wants to speak. I must paint. Because even though my artworks may take up space in a useless way, they also create some space. Space like this one–a space for people to meet–a space for sharing, opening up and listening.

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